insecurities

I was 19 years old and had been dating a wonderful man by the name of Joel for 2 years. It was a healthy relationship and Christ was growing us in love and faith but poisonous fear began to creep in. It took its effect in my mind, causing me to tremble at the word “marriage.” These doubts kept me from loving Joel extravagantly, “Am I good enough?” “Am I too young to be a wife?” “What will other people think of me?” I was selfishly afraid. However, after 3 weeks of fasting and separation, I realized that I had allowed the fear of man to control how I lived and loved. I pleaded with God to help me overcome my insecurities and his grace proved sufficient. Days after getting engaged, Joel and I wrote the song, “To Leave It All Behind.”